Sorry for the lateness of this week's post. I have to say that I have been totally distracted by personal business -- so much so that I have lost countless hours of sleep and a few more strands of hair.
I thought going to college was stressful. I thought getting married was stressful. Both of these life-altering situations pale in comparison to attempting to buy a home for the first time.
I jokingly state to anyone within earshot that I have a reservation already made at the Sinai 7 Chest Pain unit. I've already been there once so I know the accommodations very well.
We have been searching for about a month now for a new home -- one that we own. Apartment living can only go so far and there are still wedding presents that are in boxes and haven't seen the light of day -- and I've been married for about 18 months now.
It isn't the visiting of homes that creates the stress. Actually, that is the fun part because you get to see the insides of homes and see what people have done and how they live their lives.
It isn't the poring over of legal papers. I have a great theoretical mind, not theoretically have a great mind. At one time, I entertained thoughts of becoming a chemist or physicist -- but pesky colorblindness got in the way of that.
The bandying about of huge numbers doesn't really bother me at all -- because it is all on paper. I'm sure once I actually have to write those big numbers that it will be a different story altogether.
No, the biggest stress creator for me is picking out a dream home, figuring the finances and then waiting to see if your bid gets selected. And then the disappointment that follows after you get rejected.
I don't do rejection well. There hasn't been a job where I have interviewed that I have not been offered the job. Nearly all of my previous relationships have ended amicably without either side's feelings getting hurt in the process.
But to find out that I can't have a home where I have already planned out where my desk is going, which way the bed will face and where the cat litter box will be created enough turmoil to power a small city -- like Los Angeles.
Family and friends are trying to boost my spirits. I appreciate it greatly. And I know we'll find a better place that we love even more.
But this still stinks. Good thing I'm taking it out on my computer and my hockey opponents. I just hope they are as understanding when the next rejection comes.
I think most of this comes from wanting not to fail, feeling like I can do the heavy lifting and being the strong one. I'm feeling very weak and tired. Usually, that's when I'm most dangerous. Fair warning. "This is what you get when you mess with us."
Touch 'em all with me, whether you agree with me or criticize me. I like the way you think! Tell me your opinion. Write to me or add a comment below and tell me what you think or if you want to join the ever-growing e-mail list to have my column delivered right to your inbox.
"Touch 'Em All" will take a look at current events, opinions, moods, and yes, sports, but it is more than that. It will attempt to make you laugh, make you frown, make you think, and make you distracted. As the title reflects, I will be touching on all subjects (or at least as many as I can) and also provide some sort of context to the world around us. I will also be taking your e-mails as well.
4 comments:
I totally understand! I just purchased a house last fall. We actually moved in Holloween weekend. Stress does not even begin to explain what I went through! You see a place - you try not to think of your stuff there, but you fall in love with it anyway - then your bid does not get picked. UGH!! Very fustrating! I simpathize with you! We went to the bank and got pre-approved first, back in May. So, I had what you are feeling for about 4 months. In that time our apartment got worse - or maybe I just thought it got worse! Then our bid finally got accepted! :) All was happy until we had a water test - which it failed 2 times! Now we have a filtration system - paid for by the seller. Everything will be fine - eventually! You are not alone - you will make it! Good Luck!
Oh great. Now I have to worry about water testing! And I haven't studied at all!!
I hear ya! I supposedly close on my condo/townhouse on March 22
Poor, poor Larry,
Been there, done that as they say. Been in my 2nd home for 25 years - just paid off the mortgage, too. Nice feeling.
Just wanted to say hang in there. There's a reason for everything and you'll find the perfect home for both of you before you know it. What appears to be "perfect" can be a retirement home for hungry termites or have hidden cracks in the basement that heating money will flow through like water. And the "fun" of searching does eventually turn into a little bit of a money pit when you're in and need curtains/blinds, new furniture, paint/wallpaper, landscaping, and all the other little expenses that go along with a new house.
Probably one of the BEST parts of home ownership is doing taxes the next year when all that interest comes off your income and you get your first really BIG refund! Something to keep in mind for this time next year. Another is being able to play your stereo/piano/guitar as loud as you want as late as you want and not having to listen to neighbors pounding on the walls, floor, or ceiling.
Best of luck. Hope you find just the right place soon.
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